When Shepherds Wound the Flock:
Wheat, Weeds, and the God Who Sees
When Shepherds Wound the Flock:
Wheat, Weeds, and the God Who Sees
My cousin Cliff came to Christ around the same time I did. He was genuinely excited—eager to share Jesus with anyone who would listen. He went off to university, served as an associate pastor, married, and God gave them two beautiful daughters. Then the bottom fell out. He discovered his wife was having an affair with the senior pastor. When it came to light, Cliff was the one who lost his job. The senior pastor divorced his own wife and kept preaching like nothing happened.
If you’ve ever had your stomach twist at what’s done “in Jesus’ name,” you know how I feel. But let’s say it clearly: that is not Christ. That is evil, and it has no place in the Body of Christ.
Cliff is still walking with the Lord. He understands the Scriptures and he hasn’t turned on Christ. He’s just not in vocational ministry anymore. Meanwhile, the affair-turned-marriage failed too. There’s a trail of wounds only God can fully count.
Jesus told us to expect this kind of mess—not to excuse it, but to keep us from losing heart. He said the kingdom would be a field where an enemy sowed weeds among the wheat (Matt 13:24–30, 36–43). He said birds would snatch the seed (Matt 13:4, 19) and even lodge in the branches (Matt 13:31–32). He warned of wolves in sheep’s clothing (Matt 7:15) and of men who would rise up from among the elders themselves, speaking perverse things to draw away the disciples (Acts 20:29–30). None of this surprises the Lord.
But warning is not permission. God’s Word is fierce about leaders who harm the flock. “Woe to the shepherds who destroy and scatter the sheep of My pasture!” (Jer 23:1). Shepherds are to feed, guide, and guard—“not by compulsion but willingly… not as being lords over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock” (1 Pet 5:2–3). When an elder sins, the instruction isn’t to bury it; it’s to rebuke in the presence of all, that the rest also may fear (1 Tim 5:19–21). And the church is commanded to expose the unfruitful works of darkness, not fellowship with them (Eph 5:11).
Betrayal by spiritual family is a special kind of pain. David felt it: “It was not an enemy who reproached me… but it was you, a man my equal, my companion and my acquaintance” (Ps 55:12–13). Jesus felt it too—Judas wasn’t an outsider (John 13:18–30). The Lord knows the taste of that cup. He is not indifferent: “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds” (Ps 147:3). “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted” (Matt 5:4). “The God of all comfort… comforts us in all our tribulation” (2 Cor 1:3–4).
So what do we do when the church is the place we were wounded?
1) Fix your eyes on Christ, not the scandal.
The failures of men do not nullify the faithfulness of Jesus. He remains the Good Shepherd who lays down His life for the sheep (John 10:11). Churches can be mixed fields; Christ is never mixed. Look to Him and live (Num 21:8–9; John 3:14–15).
2) Refuse cynicism; pursue clean grief.
Cynicism masquerades as discernment, but it’s just unbelief with a furrowed brow. Scripture gives us lament and hope. “Pour out your heart before Him” (Ps 62:8). “Those who sow in tears shall reap in joy” (Ps 126:5). Grieve clean, with Jesus, not against Him.
3) Seek justice the biblical way.
Where sin is public and persistent, discipline is required (Matt 18:15–17; 1 Cor 5). Leaders are accountable (1 Tim 5:19–21). Protection of the flock matters. God’s justice doesn’t need our rage; “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay” (Rom 12:19). But obedience demands we tell the truth and create guardrails.
4) Guard your heart from bitterness.
Bitterness promises protection and delivers a prison. “Looking carefully lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble” (Heb 12:15). Forgiveness doesn’t mean pretending it didn’t happen; it means handing the case to the Judge and refusing to poison your own soul (Eph 4:31–32).
5) Remember that calling and employment aren’t the same.
Some who step out of formal roles are still called to shepherd—maybe a house church, a men’s group, young believers who need a steady hand. Gifts remain gifts (Rom 11:29). God can reassign without disowning.
To Cliff—and to anyone with similar scars—I want to say this: your story isn’t over. If the Lord has placed a teaching or shepherding gift in you, ask Him where to pour it out in this season. The form may be different; the fruit can be just as real. “Strengthen the hands which hang down, and the feeble knees” (Heb 12:12). Start small. Feed a few sheep. Heaven takes that seriously (John 21:15–17).
To churches and leaders, let’s be painfully practical:
Plurality and transparency. Don’t concentrate power in one man. Walk in the light (1 John 1:7).
Clear moral standards with real consequences. Sexual sin disqualifies; public sin requires public repentance and removal (1 Tim 3:2; 5:20).
Care for the wounded. The sinned-against are not collateral damage; they are sheep Jesus purchased with His own blood (Acts 20:28).
Gentle restoration for the repentant. “Restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness” (Gal 6:1), but restoration ≠ reinstatement to office.
Yes, weeds grow among the wheat. Yes, birds try to nest in holy branches. But the Lord of the harvest is not confused. He knows those who are His (2 Tim 2:19). Nothing hidden will stay hidden (Luke 8:17). In the end, the angels will sort what elders and committees could not (Matt 13:41–43). Until that day, we love the truth, guard the flock, and keep our eyes on Jesus.
It isn’t Christ who did this. Christ is the One who heals it.
Was wounded too, through no fault of my own.
This is wonderful advice, my brother, as you know bitterness can easily come into the heart. Thank you, Robert, for giving us the wisdom to handle this types of things in a godly manner.